Witchy Tabitha operates in an agitated state of mind,
Seems only cackling & spells can help her unwind,
Creating a sinster Pinnochio has given her a companion for life,
As they preform treachous horrors upon Sam Bennett's wife.

Speaking of Grace's problems galore,
We musn't overlook the daughters she adores.
Kay & Jessica are sisters of the hair pulling variety,
Animosity that only twits like Miguel & Reese can't see.

Sheridan Crane is one of society's finest,
All she requires is a prince to declare her your highness.
Similarly Luis is a man of limited hopes & dreams,
He wants the Cranes to unravel at their designer seams.

T.C's got a nasty temper of Sean Penn proportions,
No doubt wife Eve's mysterious past will lead to extortion.
Whtiney can already hear the cheers of being number one,
Smearing the courts with Martina & Venus is her brand of fun.

Thus is your average day in a little town called Harmony,
It's a nice place to visit but don't expect to hold onto your sanity.
And, if you scoff at tales of a levitating wife,
Then surely you misunderstood my passion for life.