Q & A with Tamara Clatterbuck
(Alice Johnson, The Young and the Restless)

The battle for Newman Enterprises on The Young and the Restless is nothing compared to the emotional tug-of-war going on between adoptive mom Alice Johnson and birth mother Sharon Newman over young Cassie. Thanks to a series of heartbreaking performances by Alice's portrayer, Tamara Clatterbuck, fans are having second thoughts over whether Cassie belongs with Sharon.

Clatterbuck, who has appeared on prime-time shows like NYPD Blue and Martial Law, brings passion and pathos to Alice, a well-intentioned-but-misguided soul who wants a second chance at motherhood. Here, Clatterbuck shares her thoughts on real-life motherhood, snapping at TV mom Millie, and staying true to oneself.— Michael J. Maloney


Alice first appeared in "limbo" — in a phone booth checking on Cassie, and then wasn't seen for months. Did you have any idea your part would become so important?

I had no idea. Y&R is my first soap. I was told it would be recurring and didn't know it would lead to such a great storyline. When I get any job, as an actor, I feel I really over-prepare. I get it all down. It's possible that the [writers and producers] saw what I was doing and said, "Hey, maybe we should keep her around?"

Alice is so cruel to her mother, Millie, calling her "stupid old woman" all the time.

Yes. Ernestine (Mercer, who plays Millie) told me once that it really broke her heart when Alice was so mean to her. It was right after one of our first scenes together. [Laughs] I was so fearful that the crew would think that I was this horrible person. But Ernestine understood. I try to play that Alice really had an awful childhood and that Millie wasn't the best mother. Yes, Alice is mean to her mother, but I feel that there's a reason that people behave a certain way. I always try to show that Alice was a hurt child. Like we all are!

You and Ernestine get along much better off-camera.

Yes. I'll do things like bring her to the studio. [Laughs] If the fans could see me driving "Millie" to work, I think they'd forgive me.

You said once that Camryn (Grimes, who plays Alice's daughter Cassie) ran away from you. Talk about getting into character!

[Laughs] Yeah. Camryn saw me and said, "You're mean, Alice," and she ran away. I told her that I was just playing a character and we worked it out. She's so cute. We did the scene where Alice told her what she weighed at birth, and her [real-life] mom came up to me and said that scene was beautiful. The next day, Camryn came running up to me and said, "You do such good work, Tamara." She's so adorable. You just can't stop hugging her.

A real tear-jerking moment was when Alice told Cassie that she had given her her treasured doll Cindy.

Thank you. I get mail from people who say that they want Alice to win custody. People say to me that just because you have money, it doesn't make you a good parent. Personally, I'd like Alice to win.

Has working with Camryn stirred any maternal instincts in you?

They were already stirred because... [laughs] I'm not 20. I still have plenty of time, but I've always loved children. Before I was a working actress, I worked as a nanny. I've always wanted a daughter. Cami is so cute and I love kids.

Your name and voice are pretty unique. Did agents ever try to get you to change?

Everybody has tried to get me to change everything about myself. My voice. My name. My breasts. The biggest trap an actor can fall into is letting people try to change them. The heroines in films are like Michelle Pfeiffer and in the soap world they look like Sharon Case (who plays Sharon). They don't look and sound like Tamara Clatterbuck. I tell aspiring actors who ask for my advice to stay true to who you are and accept yourself. Live in your truth and you will succeed. An agent told me once that my voice upstaged me. He wanted to turn me into a blond, blue-eyed bimbo with a different last name. There are a billion of those in Los Angeles. There were times when I was tempted. But I think if you keep your integrity and don't sell out, then that's really the most important thing.

Steven Bochco certainly knew you had something unique to offer when he cast you on NYPD Blue as Deena Farnham, a hooker who helped nail the killers of Andy Jr.

I adore anyone who has the guts to hire me like [Steven Bochco] and Mr. [Bill] Bell have done. He could have hired someone who was more generic to play Alice, but he went for something unique. I really respect that. Show business runs on fear. Fear to take a chance. Fear stops people from achieving some success. Everybody gets so scared of anything that might be different, but if you go with it, you can come out on top. It's a harder battle, but in the end I think that it's worth it. [NYPD Blue scribe] David Milch is a brilliant writer. Nothing is commercial in [his and Bochco's] shows. [Laughs] It was painful for me to look that disgusting on national television. But let's get real. Deena was a prostitute who had no education and did crack cocaine. What's she going to look like? It's not easy to let yourself look like that. [Laughs] I wouldn't want any guy I have a date with see me like that.

You must have liked it when Alice cleaned up for the trial?

I'm very grateful for that. [Smiles] It's nice to be able to run a comb through your hair. One time, Alice showed up in a leopard dress to go to court. They never showed the actual scene, but Michael must have gotten her another outfit because he knew that she'd have to clean herself up before going in front of the judge.

Are you enjoying being recognized by fans?

Boy, has my life changed. I was in the ladies room at the Hotel Del Coronado in San Diego and these women came up to me and got their cameras out. The first thing one of them said was, "You're so much prettier and younger on TV." [Laughs] I knew it was meant as a huge compliment. They wanted to take my picture right there in the bathroom, but I suggested we go out to the garden.

There was a particularly powerful moment for Alice in the courtroom after Chris exposed Al as a child molester. Alice's dreams were crushed in that one moment, and she really let Al have it.

That episode's director, Kathy Foster, told me to just put it out there and do whatever I wanted to do. She and [producer] David Shaughnessy gave me that freedom. I hope that the fans are rooting for the underdog because that's what Alice is.

Alice had that photo of Victor Newman on her mirror for quite a while. Would you like to work with Eric Braeden [Victor]?

I would love to. I walked up to Eric at the show's 26th anniversary party and introduced myself to him. He said, "I've seen you're work and you're wonderful." I have to say that meant a lot to me.

Now that Alice is single again, who would you like to see her paired with?

Michael Baldwin. There's a part of him that's very sweet that I think could be capitalized on. Plus, I love working with Christian (Le Blanc, who plays Michael). He's a very good actor. We did a scene recently where Michael walked in and saw pain on Alice's face. He reached out and put his hand on my arm in a supportive way. It wasn't scripted, but he did it anyway. It might go unnoticed, but it didn't go unnoticed by me as an actress. I also love working with Doug Davidson (Paul). We worked together in a Fox TV-movie called L.A. Johns a long time before I was cast on Y&R. I played his wife. Jeanne Cooper [Kay] is so complimentary towards me. I asked her if she was excited about going to New York for the Emmys and she said, "Dear, next year, it will be your turn.'' That made my day.